idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
