her vagine was all disorganized.
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
