Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
Randomize
