there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
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