Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
