remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
My bed smells like the plague
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
