whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
My vagina is officially offended.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
This toilet bowl is my home.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
