so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize