question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
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