You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
