You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
He shit in the fireplace
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
