Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize
