i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Randomize
