he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
So squirting runs in the family.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Randomize