I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
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