Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
