Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
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