For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
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