she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
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