She's JV to your varsity
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize