i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize