Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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