Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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