Who wears a wallet chain?!
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
please come you make the beer taste better
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
Randomize