I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
