i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
i've created a new STD.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Randomize
