Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
