"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
