so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize