We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
