Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
