i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
