So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
