just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Randomize
