I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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