you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I just counted my steps so I know when you start looking for you on my way back from the bathroom
You know how us drunks love counting steps
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
