did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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