I should be sponsored by Trojan
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
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