Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize