You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize