Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Randomize