But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize
