How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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