Life is so much better after having sex.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize