yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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