today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Randomize
