you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
