Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Randomize