just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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