meet me or not, i'm out of control
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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