so explain again why im purple
no
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
